'Finding Light in the Shade this January' - Roscrea's Emma Coonan's monthly column

'January is often a hard month. It will be a while still before we see a real stretch in the evenings (although there is enough of it there to legitimately start every conversation with a ‘thank God for the stretch’ nonetheless!),' writes Roscrea's Emma Coonan in her January column..

Mornings are dark, and a week of grey followed by a week of rain is enough to set anyone’s nerves on edge.

Last Sunday saw the first bit of sunshine in what felt like a very long time.

Looking out the window at the bit of blue sky and dry grass, it didn’t take us long to decide to head out for a walk by the sea. And judging by the throngs we met walking, bathing, and queuing for ice-creams, we were not the only ones.

Although we all knew deep down that it was too cold for ice-creams, shorts, and swims, it felt like a universal decision had been made to seize the sun, and the day. It reminded me that where there is shade there is light, and often it is only after a period of shade that we can really relish the light.

Many Shades of Winter

Winter can bring much beauty and joy, and there are many who say it is their favourite season.

It can be a time to wrap up warm, light the fire, or enjoy a hot whiskey or a hot cocoa, depending on your taste. Often the pressure to be out and about is lifted when the weather is rough, and binging on the latest series doesn’t come with any of the seasonal guilt that may arise when the sun is beckoning outside.

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Christmas and the Holiday season is also a light in the dark for many.

Lights, music, and twinkling tinsel break through the darkness and relieve the monotony of dark Winter days. I know many who keep some of their decorations up until the end of January, enjoying an unofficial elongation of the season.

For others, Winter, and January in particular, can be a ‘grin and bear it until it’s over’ time. The frivolities are behind us, Spring is ahead of us, but January can feel like a no man’s land in between, especially when the rain in pouring, finances may be stretched, and pressures to ring in a new year are all around.

Where there is Shade, there is Light

I have always been attracted to ideas about light and shade, ying and yang, balance and equilibrium. Those of you who have read some of these articles will know I am a fan of writing about the seasons! For me, the seasons are the best balance we have, as they will come and go no matter what, and the world keeps on turning, no matter what.

When it comes to our wellbeing, sometimes coming back to simple ideas about balance can help us to connect with the balance we need in our own lives.

It is hard to think about light and shade without thinking about the great Leonard Cohen. Most of you may know his much quoted lyrics “there is a crack...in everything, that’s how the light gets in.”

This wonderful line reminds us that in the constancy of light and shade, whether found in the seasons, song lyrics, or a sunny day in January, there is always hope, there is beauty in the imperfections, and there is a universality to the troubles we all share as we journey through life.

Starting Anew and Again

As is often the way when the chorus of a song is regularly quoted, the verses can be forgotten. As much as I love this chorus about the cracks in everything, I always loved the verse before it, which reminds us to start again, and afresh, when we need to;

“The birds they sang
Break of day
Start again
I heard them say
Don’t dwell on what has passed away
Or what is yet to be”

Mindfulness teaches us that when we get too lost in the past, or too wrapped up in the future, we are rarely productive, kind to ourselves, or living our best stress free lives.

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Returning to the moment, through simple acts of remembering to breath, smelling the coffee brewing, or enjoying a sneaky January scone can reduce our anxiety levels enough to gain some perspective, and slow our racing minds. In other words, and even more aptly in the great Leonard Cohen’s words, to start again.

A final thought

January can be a tough month for many, as we straddle the light and dark of the Winter season. Finding our own balance and taking the sunny moments where we find them can help us to start again as we make our way towards Spring.

Emma Coonan (pictured above) is an Accredited Psychotherapist with IAHIP and ICP, Lectures in Psychotherapy, and is a qualified Adult Education Trainer. After leaving Coláiste Phobal Roscrea, Emma studied English and Media in Maynooth University, before combining her Psychotherapy training with experience in the corporate world. Emma focuses on applying Psychotherapy practices for everyday living, through developing resilience, stress response, and mindfulness practice.