THE LONG READ: Importance of kindness stressed by Offaly columnist

At the start of each new week during the Lenten season just past I always tried to dedicate the week to kindness and trying to be kind to people and to try and treat people the way I would like to be treated. Also I looked or tried to imagine ways I could “Be Kind” for the good of others during that coming week. I am now hoping as we enter into the Easter season after Lent to continue doing this for as long as I can hopefully well into the future. Spiritual thoughts on kindness emphasize its role as a core virtue, reflecting God's character and leading to spiritual growth and connection with others. Kindness is not just a passive state but an active choice to be loving, compassionate, empathetic, and merciful, ultimately contributing to a more loving and peaceful world.

Fruit of the Holy Spirit

Another thing I am always mindful of is what Abraham Lincoln once said: “Kindness is the only service that will stand the storms of life and not wash out. It will wear well and be remembered long after the prism of politeness or the complexion of courtesy has faded away. When I am gone, I hope it can be said of me that I plucked a thistle and planted a flower wherever I thought a flower would grow.” Kindness is no small thing. It yields marvelous fruit both in our lives and the lives of those around us. “Whoever pursues righteousness and kindness will find life, righteousness, and honor” (Proverbs 21:21). We open ourselves to the supernatural work of the Holy Spirit when we ask him to produce in us kind hearts that overflow through kind lips.

What I have found through observing being kind during these last few months is that when you experience deep kindness in your heart, you are at peace inwardly and see everything as part of God. You accept all things without judgment, and look with kindness and sympathy on everyone, no matter how wrong. Always be kind to others so that you may learn the art of being kind to yourself. So in this week 'thought,' I am going to explore the fifth fruit of the Holy Spirit, kindness. Kindness is having a heart that is willing to do acts of compassion and give to others above and beyond what we owe to them. True kindness is aligned closely with forgiveness. "Get rid of all bitterness, rage, and anger, brawling and slander, along with every form of malice. Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you." Ephesians 4:31-32

Small kindnesses

It’s no secret that the world is in a state of turmoil. Every day, there’s another headline about some new act of violence or hatred or some conflict or more tariffs being imposed here and there. It can be easy to get overwhelmed by all the bad news and feel like there’s nothing we can do to make a difference. But there is something we as individuals can do. We can always choose kindness. It may not seem like much, but choosing to be kind to our fellow human beings and the world around us can make a big difference. In the quest to create a gentler, more loving world, kindness is the easiest tool we can use. Though it is easy to overlook opportunities to be kind, our lives are full of situations in which we can be helpful, considerate, thoughtful, caring, loving and friendly to loved ones as well as strangers.

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The touching, selfless acts of kindness that have the most profoundly uplifting effects are often the simplest: a word of praise, a gentle touch, a helping hand, a gesture of courtesy, a listening ear, a warm friendly letter, card or email, the lighting of a prayer candle, a hug or a smile. Such small kindnesses represent an unconditional form of love that we are free to give or withhold at will. When you give the gift of kindness, whether in the form of assistance, concern, or friendliness, your actions create a beacon of happiness and hope that warms people’s hearts.

The components of kindness are compassion, mercy, love, care, empathy, respect and generosity. Put simply, kindness is the conscious act of engaging others in a positive way without asking whether those individuals deserve to be treated kindly. All living beings thrive on kindness. A single, sincere compliment can turn a person’s entire world around. Holding a door, or thanking someone who has held a door for you, can inspire others to practice politeness and make already kind individuals feel good about their efforts. Smiling at people you meet, even those who make you feel like frowning, can turn a dreary encounter into a delightful one, for both of you. Every kind act has a positive influence on the individual who has performed the act as well as on the recipient, regardless of whether the act is acknowledged. Kindness brings about more kindness and slowly but surely makes a positive impact on humanity.

You’ll discover that each act of kindness you engage in makes the world, in some small way, a better place and it warms the heart's of many. Kindness starts with caring and being tenderhearted and compassionate toward others. Kindness is humbly giving of ourselves in love and mercy to others who may not be able to give anything back, who sometimes don’t deserve it, and who frequently don’t thank us for it. Basically kindness means a way of thinking that leads to doing thoughtful deeds for others and doing good to them and for them.

Kind goodness

Helping and being kind to others is not only a good thing to do, it also makes us happier. Giving also connects us to others and helps to build a happier society for everyone. And it's not all about money, we can also give of our time and energy. So if you want to feel good, do good! Doing things for others, whether small, unplanned acts or regular volunteering is a powerful way to boost our own happiness as well as those around us. The people we help may be strangers, family, friends, colleagues or neighbors. They can be old or young, nearby or far away. Giving to others can be as simple as a single kind word, smile or a thoughtful gesture. It can include giving time, care, skills, thought or attention.

Acts of kindness increases life satisfaction, provides a sense of meaning, increases feelings of competence, improves our mood and reduces stress. It can help to take our minds off our own troubles too. Giving to others helps us connect with people and meets one of our basic human needs - relatedness and belonging. Kindness and caring also seem to be contagious. When we see someone do something kind or thoughtful, or we are on the receiving end of kindness, it inspires us to be kinder ourselves. Kindness and selfless giving really are the key to creating a happier, more trusting community.

So for the rest of this year I am deliberately going to try and nourish my soul with acts of kindness. The following is a list of acts of kindness that we can all do and you can add to the list if you want. ‘Say “I love you” to the people you love. Hold the door open for the person behind you. Let someone out in front of you in traffic. Give something to the homeless or a charity in need especially if you can, your time. Write a thank you note to one of your teachers or someone that supported you in the past or present and let them know how grateful you are for them. Call a friend you haven’t spoken to in a while. Put some money in the parking meter or on the cafe bill for the next person. Help the elderly and parents with small children. Thank the men and women in uniform. Smile and say hello to a complete stranger. Pay someone’s toll. Be kind to people and animals. Pick up a bill in a restaurant. Volunteer in your community. Practice gratitude everyday and simply be kind. Take a minute to direct someone who is lost. Offer to pick up groceries for an elderly neighbor. Give a homeless person a cup of tea or a friendly listening ear. Help a mother carry her baby stroller up the shopping centre stairs. Each time you get a new item of clothing, give away something old. Bring your colleagues coffee. Out of the blue, send flowers to a friend. Say “please” and “thank you”—and really mean it. When you’re on a crowded train or bus, offer your seat to an elderly, disabled or pregnant person. Don’t interrupt when someone is explaining themselves. Let a fellow driver merge into your lane. Forgive someone a debt–and never bring it up again. Listen with all your senses. Help as much as you can the most vulnerable and needy in our society. Write a note to the boss of someone who helps you, and explain how great a job that person is doing. Simply say “I’m sorry” when you’re wrong. Encourage someone who seems despondent. Ask someone “How are you really doing?”—and then really listen to their response. Do good as much as you can. Add to your own list of acts of kindness you can do this year.

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"The €5 notes"

"Two boys walked down a road that led through a field. The younger of the two noticed a man toiling in the fields of his farm, his good clothes stacked neatly off to the side. The boy looked at his older friend and said, “Let’s hide his shoes so when he comes from the field, he won’t be able to find them. His expression will be priceless!” The boy laughed. The older of the two boys thought for a moment and said, “The man looks poor. See his clothes? Let’s do this instead: Let’s hide a €5 note in each shoe and then we’ll hide in these bushes and see how he reacts to that, instead.” The younger companion agreed to the plan and they placed a €5 note in each shoe and hid behind the bushes. It wasn’t long before the farmer came in from the field, tired and worn. He reached down and pulled on a shoe, immediately feeling the money under his foot. With the €5 note now between his fingers, he looked around to see who could have put it in his shoe. But no one was there. He held the €5 note in his hand and stared at it in disbelief. Confused, he slid his other foot into his other shoe and felt the second €5 note.

This time, the man was overwhelmed when he removed the second €5 note from his shoe. Thinking he was alone, he dropped to his knees and offered a verbal prayer that the boys could easily hear from their hiding place. They heard the poor farmer cry tears of relief and gratitude. He spoke of his sick wife and his boys in need of food. He expressed gratitude for this unexpected bounty from unknown hands. After a time, the boys came out from their hiding place and slowly started their long walk home.

They felt good inside, warm, changed somehow knowing the good they had done to a poor farmer in dire straits. A smile crept across their souls. We all have "poor farmers" toiling in the fields of their trials and difficulties along the roads of our lives. Their challenges might not be known to us. But their countenances often tell a story of pain. We have opportunities to hide shoes or hide "€5 notes" in them. When I hear of stories of kindness being done to others, I’m inspired to do the same. I think most of us are like that. We need each other’s inspiration as we travel life’s highways, trying to figure it all out. So please be kind to yourself and to one another. We all need acts of kindness in our life. They help make us better people. What acts of kindness have you performed? What kindnesses by others have blessed your life? Give the gift of kindness and “Be Kind”, as much as you can on your journey of life.

Ripple effects of kindness

As the saying goes, “Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart." The fruit of all true life practices is kindness, kindness to others and also to ourselves. It is easy to speak and read about kindness, it is another to make it into your flesh and bones. In most cases, kindness is not beyond any of us because it usually costs no money. It may take the sacrifice of time and energy. It may require the discipline to be thoughtful of others' needs and to make the effort to act. How much is required to cultivate smiling rather than frowning, to pay a visit, to say a word of encouragement or comfort, to show friendliness by warmly and sincerely shaking hands or giving a hug to someone?

The consequences of kindness are incalculable, for such a spirit can ripple out to touch the lives of those far removed from the original act. Kindness sows the seeds that can only bear good fruit. Kindness should begin with our family and close friends. Ironically and tragically, many people display their most unkind behavior with the ones they should love the most. Kindness is not a selfish attempt to get something for ourselves. It is a show of mercy and love to other human beings with no thought of reward. May we all develop the same type of love and kindness God has for us. Remember as Scott Adams once said, "there’s no such thing as a small act of kindness. Every act creates a ripple with no logical end."

Can you imagine a world where no one gave to each other? Where we all just looked after our own needs and ignored everyone else’s? This would surely be a miserable place to live, for ultimately, whether spontaneous or planned, we cannot be happy without being kind, by giving, loving and caring for each other. Acts of kindness are essential to our well-being, as they liberate us from self-obsession, selfishness, and isolation. They are the effect of an open and loving nature. True generosity is giving without expectation, with no need to be repaid in any form. This is the most powerful act of generosity, as it is unconditional, unattached, and free to land wherever it will. Whether we give to our family, friends, or to strangers, it is the same. We may feel we have little to offer, but whether it is a few pennies or a whole bankroll, a cup of tea or a banquet is irrelevant. It is the act of giving itself that is important. As Mahatma Gandhi said, "Almost anything kind we do will seem insignificant, but it is very important that we do it." Acts of kindness makes us feel good, valuable and alive. Think about the last time you went out of your way to be kind to someone. Didn’t it make your day too? Many people extend kindness as part of their good nature, but what if we made a more conscious effort to be even kinder by practicing kindness regularly? We will be spreading good feelings and making a difference that has a lasting, ripple effect and undoubtedly changing the world.

Every kindness

Practice kindness while expecting nothing in return except the good feelings that these acts provide is life-giving and can also be life-saving. Every interaction is an opportunity to lift someone up or bring them down. A kind word can brighten a tough day, while a careless remark can leave lasting hurt. That’s why it’s important to be mindful of how you speak and act. The energy you bring into someone’s life can make all the difference, whether it’s encouragement, support, or just being present when they need someone.

Relationships are built on emotions, not just words or actions. Whether it’s family, friends, or strangers, the way you make people feel shapes their perception of you. Respect, kindness, and understanding create strong connections, while negativity and indifference push people away. Treating others with care doesn’t just impact them—it also shapes the kind of person you become. At the end of the day, people may forget the details of what you said or did, but they will always remember how they felt around you. Choose to be someone who spreads kindness, warmth, and positivity. The impact of that choice will last far longer than any words ever could.

Thought for the week

As your thought for the week, make it your goal and habit to be actively looking for opportunities to show kindness and “To Be Kind”, to one another and to others when it is possible and needed. Our world is in desperate need of the fruit of the Holy Spirit of kindness. We need tender hearted people with a desire to share generously with others. In kindness, the Holy Spirit gives. Let’s live by doing things differently. Let’s live in the Holy Spirit with a merciful, gracious temperament in true love and “Be Kind” to ourselves and others. Kindness is a lifestyle and a gift of the Holy Spirit. It is a daily practice. It is a choice. As people of this world we are to grow in the fruit of the spirit – love, joy, peace, patience, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control, and kindness – and growth takes time.

A seed does not transform into a tree overnight, but with careful watering, tending, and patience, a seed will slowly grow day-by-day into a strong towering tree. It is the same with kindness. We must be faithful every day to bear the good fruit of kindness. Being kind should be our default mode, a habit of goodwill, a heart of continual service every day of the year. Practice genuine kindness as much as you can in your daily life and ‘plant flowers’ and 'warm people's hearts' wherever you can! Three things in human life are important: the first is to be kind; the second is to be kind; and the third is to be kind. No act of kindness is ever wasted. And always remember that compassion has no limit and kindness has no enemy.

Be kind and “Do Good”, always or as much as you can!! "To Be Kind" is to be Christlike. Not for just a season or one day of the year, kindness is for every moment of every day; it’s a habit, a lifestyle, a continual practice. It is intentional, taking time and patience, a giving of ourselves in “the busy,” even when we are “too tired.” And lastly, kindness is for absolutely everyone. As we intentionally show kindness each day, may we shine the light of Christ to a dying world in need of a savior, a generation in need of love and grace. Be Jesus to someone today and every day; make Him your role model and kindness your lifestyle. In a world where you can be anything, Be kind!! I believe the best thing you can be in life is to "Be Kind".

Kindness in words creates confidence. Kindness in deed creates truth. Kindness in love creates life. Kindness in thinking creates profoundness. Kindness in giving creates love. Kindness in being the real you, creates the world. Kindness in prayer creates faith. Kindness in faith creates safety. Kindness in honesty creates unity. Kindness in action creates kindness. If you're to be anything in this world, Be Kind. Let love and kindness be your reason. Let love and kindness be your drive. Let your love and kindness be a bridge to help others, to help everyone. Let love and kindness fill you with power and the authentic purpose of being who you really are. Let love and kindness heal your hurts and inspire your actions. Have the courage, acceptance and humility to feel love fully. Have the strength and confidence to give your love freely. Let love fill your thoughts with goodness and your intentions with kindness. Let love and kindness brighten every corner of your world. Let love and kindness flow abundantly from you before you even think about it. Let love and kindness illuminate the unique and miraculous richness in every unfolding moment. Let love and kindness live within you, and spread beauty through all you do. Let love and kindness be, with all you have and all you are. There has never been anything outside of you as bright or as beautiful or as awesome as the potential and heart and soul and love and kindness inside of you. Be your true caring, kind and loving self. Much prayers and a few candles lighting just now to and for everyone in need of one now at this time and always. Amen