Support service evening for Offaly people affected by suicide attracts large attendance

The evening was aimed at those who had unfortunately lost a loved one or a friend, colleague, work mate or team mate to suicide. 

The purpose of the event was to provide awareness on the supports and services that are available to help people to find hope and to navigate life after their loss and to enable them to get to a place where they can live with their grief.

Josephine Rigney, Resource Officer for Suicide Prevention HSE Midlands, welcomed everyone to the evening and advised that one of the key aims of Ireland’s National Strategy for Suicide Prevention ‘Connecting for Life’ is to provide information regarding accessible, high quality services that may be of assistance to people who have been bereaved by suicide in an effort to support them in navigating the tragic loss that has come into their lives.

Sgt Michael Dardis, from the Birr District Office, spoke about the role of An Garda Síochána following a suspected death through suicide. 

This role is both investigative and supportive and whilst he acknowledged that it can initially seem to be intrusive for families, their members strive to give advice, guidance and support both in the initial stages and right up to the point of the Inquest taking place.   He advised that some families are allocated a Family Liaison Officer, who is a specifically trained Officer and this direct contact can be very supportive and helpful for families.

Maria McKeon, who is the Support Groups Manager for HUGG, spoke about the services that the charity provide, which include suicide specific information, telephone support, guidance and peer led support groups.  .  She spoke about how those bereaved by suicide experience more feelings of abandonment, rejection, shame and stigma and often struggle with the unanswerable questions of why?

Marie explained that recent research shows that suicide bereavement support groups provide ongoing help to participants in various ways, including normalising the grief journey, enabling the sharing of personal experiences and lowering grief reactions.

All HUGG Support Groups are led by trained volunteers with lived experience of suicide loss and that there are currently 14 in-person groups throughout Ireland and 4 online virtual groups.  HUGG aims to have one peer support group in each county in Ireland and are seeking the help of volunteers to train as facilitators to run a group for the Midlands area. The contact details for HUGG are: 01 515 4048; email:  support@hugg.ie ; or www.hugg.ie.

Bernie Carroll, Pieta Suicide Bereavement Liaison Officer for the Midlands, spoke about the various services that Pieta provide, i.e. their national helpline 1800 247 247; their therapy services 0818 111 126 and their suicide bereavement liaison service which is available in all counties with the aim of providing prompt emotional and practical support to anyone who has been bereaved by suicide. 

This support is provided on an individual or group basis via face to face, online or telephone, whichever the individual is most comfortable with.   The support is available to family members, friends and colleagues, workmates and team mates and is available regardless of the length of time since the death occurred.

Bernie spoke about providing guidance to parents/guardians in relation to having conversations with children and young people and such support is available. Requests and referrals for support can be made individually or through any professional service.  Bernie is contactable on 086 418 0088; email: Bernie.carroll@pieta.ie or www.pieta.ie

Ruth Kennedy told those who attended the Suicide Bereavement Support Awareness evening of her story of loss following the suicide of her first born son, Reuben, two and a half years ago.    After 18 year old Reuben died, Ruth’s life centred on how to keep herself and her family moving forward without him.  She spoke about the emotions she feels daily and how the paralysing effect of grief doesn’t happen as often; not because the size of her grief has changed, but because the emotional muscles that help her to carry it are stronger.    

In her talk Ruth emphasised the supports that she received.  An Garda Síochána’s Family Liaison Officer was there to guide, advise and support from the very beginning of their tragic journey through to the Inquest process.   Pieta provided supportive counselling sessions which gave her hope for the future.   After her individual sessions with Pieta, she joined the HUGG peer support group in Galway where she connected with people at different stages in their grief.

Walking the Camino with friends taught Ruth that moving forward physically enabled her to move forward mentally and also that she needed time to stop and rest  so as to face struggles with renewed energy.   She spoke about the importance of symbols, especially those things that were important to Reuben, and how she incorporates them into her life now.  

There were days when it became all too much, and during those times, Ruth relied on her writing and conversations with her husband to get through.    She noted that everyone is trying to cope in their own way and no-one is sure what’s the right thing to do.   For her family, the only thing they could do, and did do, was to keep talking and listening to each other.

Ruth spoke about how grieving is an ongoing process which continues to change and unfold for her family.  Everyone walks their own path of grief but they are not alone.  Talking, sharing and listening gives connection and hope and enables isolation and despair to dissolve.  She encouraged all present to reach out for support from family and friends and also from the specialised bereavement services that are there to support everyone on their own individual grief journey. 

The evening cloncluded with Josephine thanking everyone for their attendance and invited everyone to stay for some tea and a chat. During this time people had the opportunity to chat with the speakers individually and gather information leaflets on support services. 

A second ‘Suicide Bereavement Support Services Awareness Evening’ is being held on June 13 at the Mullingar Park Hotel, Dublin Road, Mullingar, Co. Westmeath, N91A4EP

There is no need to register for this event and all are welcome. 

For additional information please contact: Patrick.jones1@hse.ie