A step in the direction of Wellbeing - monthly wellbeing column with Emma Coonan

The longest day of the year was celebrated last week, as for many the Summer Solstice represents the promise of long evenings still to come. For others, this annual event is bittersweet, particularly for those who can’t help but think about the gradual shortening of the days to come, even if it is only minuscule.

Many of us can fall into one of these modes of thought. Whether that comes from a feeling of pressure to be ‘enjoying ourselves’ while the weather is good, or panicking that there won’t be enough time left to enjoy ourselves before the days shorten, we can each find ourselves struggling, for various reasons, at this time of year.

Men’s Health Week was celebrated this month. While reading about it, I came across an article about the Portlaoise Irish Men’s Shed, and its 10 year anniversary celebration. It was terrific to see this great initiative celebrated locally, reminding me that there are many routes to supporting our wellbeing.

The power of human connection

Reading about the Irish Men’s Sheds this month, I was reminded of the simple yet vital power of connecting with others. This connection can be a powerful part of our wellbeing routines, as we are naturally social beings who often find support in connection with people, place, and community.

This connection can be found through spending time with others, particularly others who share our interests, have a similar outlook on life, or who might have a different approach and can help us to consider a new perspective on things.

Taking some inspiration from the activities of Men’s Health Week this month, what positive connections, hobbies, or outlets could you forge during the weeks to come that could support a feeling of connection with others? Remember, these don’t have to be complicated, and can start with the smallest step.

Shifting our perspective

While reading the beginning of this article, you might have found yourself associating with one or other of the two ‘Summer Solstice’ perspectives – evenings still to come, or evenings passed. Often we find ourselves leaning towards one or the other, depending on our perspective, or even our mood.
A familiar saying is sometimes used to describe this kind of perspective, and that is ‘are you a glass half full, or a glass half empty’ person?

Although we may all recognise this phrase, it can feel a little limiting. There is another example sometimes used when describing resilience and wellbeing, and that is to imagine holding a glass of water. The glass of water itself isn’t heavy, but if we keep holding it, it can begin to feel heavy. In other words, we sometimes need to put down the things we are carrying for a little while, or else no matter how light they were to start out with, they can begin to feel heavy.

When it comes to our wellbeing, this can mean finding simple ways to take our minds off our worries for a little while, or focusing on something new to lift our spirits. Through connecting with others for even the briefest time, we often find we come away with something new to consider, or feeling like we have a lighter load to carry.

Taking a step in the direction of wellbeing

This time of year can feel like a mixed bag for many people. Even as we hear ourselves saying “sure I’m grand” when asked how we are, we may at times be feeling the opposite.

Often a step in the direction of wellbeing is recognising that it's ok to say we are not ok.

For those of us who are ok with saying we are not ok sometimes, we can forget that there are many out there, both men and women, who don’t find this so easy. Sometimes the route to wellbeing can start with giving ourselves this permission, and from there we can start to connect with supports that make sense for our own unique wellbeing journey.

This connection may come in the form of simply having a chat over a cup of tea, doing the hobbies we enjoy with others who enjoy the same, or getting out and about with others, be they friends, neighbours, or new friends we just haven’t met yet, to enjoy a change of scenery.

A final thought...

It is important to remember that there are many routes to wellbeing out there. Connecting with others who share our hobbies, interests, or simply our love of a cup of tea and a biscuit, can help us to find the support we need to help us on our own wellbeing journey.

Emma Coonan is an Accredited Psychotherapist with IAHIP and ICP, Lectures in Psychotherapy, and is a qualified Adult Education Trainer. After leaving Coláiste Phobal Roscrea, Emma studied English and Media in Maynooth University, before combining her Psychotherapy training with experience in the corporate world. Emma focuses on applying Psychotherapy practices for everyday living, through developing resilience, stress response, and mindfulness practice.