INTERVIEW: 'Now I see my child can smile' says Ukrainian mum in Offaly

A UKRAINIAN refugee who has moved to Offaly has told of how relieved she is that her daughter is smiling again after they fled their home to escape the war.

Tetiana Komarova, 41, and her six-year-old daughter Yana are currently staying with a family in the Durrow area.

Tetiana was living in Kyiv and first sought refuge in central Ukraine before deciding it would be safer to join the millions of others on the move to elsewhere in Europe.

Speaking to the Tribune this week as Yana enjoyed herself in the Tullamore Town Park playground, Tetiana said she had been hoping she would not have to leave her own country but was forced to make a decision when they heard the sounds of rockets.

“We hear it, we hear a lot of (imitates explosive noises) and then we decided to [move]. But all this time, we hoped that it will stop tomorrow, and tomorrow, and every day we waited, it will stop, it will stop,” she said.

But the bombing did not stop. “We go to the central part of Ukraine and from there I decided to take my child to the safe place. It was my only motivation to go.”

Her husband Sasha, an IT engineer, has stayed behind and continues to work but has also signed up for the Ukrainian territorial defence.

She keeps in regular contact with him because they all fear nowhere in Ukraine is safe from Russian bombing, either near Kyiv, in the east of the country, in the centre, or near the Polish border at Lviv.

“We were near a little town about 50km from this village. It was bombed. There is no safe place. Yesterday they bombed Lviv.”

Tetiana, a university graduate who has studied Russian literature, worked as a journalist, editor, publishing designer and in internal corporate communications, had her bags packed even before the Russian invasion on February 24.

She had “two bags” ready on February 21 and when she finally decided to leave Ukraine, she said Yana cried: “She cried in the bus and she understood that Father will stay and will not go with us. After this she did not cry.

“But only now will she let me go from her more than a metre. When she doesn't see me she starts to cry 'Mam, Mam', she needs to be near.”

Yana was not like that before the war. She was independent and liked to run and play and though they tried “not to show her what is happening” she saw armed men at a checkpoint on the journey to central Ukraine.

“She saw everything and she asked me what is it. I have to explain to her there is a war, these people are our hope, they protect us, it is our army or it is our territorial defence. But for a child I think it's bad to see this.”

Tetiana, who learned English when she was 10, said she was very grateful to all the Irish people who have helped her, especially the woman in her host family.

“Because they take so much care about me, about Yana,” she said. She has become friendly with the woman, who wishes to remain anonymous, and laughs that her Offaly host refers to herself as a “crazy woman”.

“But she is the best woman I know. Now I see that my child can smile, she can play, she plays with [the] dogs. She is feeling safe.”

Tetiana came to Ireland after receiving responses from people here through online enquiries and part of her trip was documented in a video published by the Irish Times.

She was originally scheduled to stay with a family in the Killeigh area first but that was postponed because of a positive Covid test in the house.

Both families are liaising closely with each other to ensure the transition will be as smooth as possible for Tetiana and her daughter.

Tetiana said she hopes to be able to work in Ireland and contribute to society when she is more settled.

“I hope that Yana will go to school... it's my first task, she needs to communicate, to get education. After this I hope I will try to find some work. In Ukraine almost all people work hard, we are used to living like [that], I can't do nothing. It's very hard for me.

“I hope that I will find work and I will be useful for this country. All the time I stay here I will try to be useful here.”

She repeatedly thanked the Irish people and the people in countries like Poland, Hungary and Romania for their help.

An appeal for clothing and essentials at the Central Hotel in Tullamore, where some refugees are staying, was so well supported that donors were asked not to bring anything else and were referred on to the Offaly Volunteer Centre.

“I hope that the whole world will see that Ukrainians are united, that we can be very grateful for everything, that we will, all [during the] time we have to stay somewhere, not at home, we will do our best for our country and other countries.”

She “very much” misses her home life and her husband. “I work, my husband works, we have some plans, we have some dreams, we thought about Yana's future. And I don't know how... to leave everything we love behind, it's very difficult.

“All my friends, they are now waiting for our victory [so they can] come back, get home.”

She agrees with the government's decision to prohibit men aged between 18 and 60 from leaving Ukraine.

“If you are a man, even if you don't want to fight, you can help, you can build, you can do something that women can't... try to build... help with somewhere where there is ruins, take away people. You can do something else,” she said.

“I hope that this war will not only change Ukraine but the whole world will be changed. Only our all work will help. We all will work for our victory. We are here and they are in Ukraine.”

She said would have seen herself as a political person before the invasion and was especially moved when she saw police beating students during the Maidan revolution (an uprising against the government after it decided not to sign a free trade agreement with the EU) in 2014.

Her opinion was: “What, they beat our children?”

Tetiana explained: “I am an educated person and I know that if you will not be interested in politics, politics will be interested some time in you. That's why I tried to understand what happens in my country before the war. I have a child, I know that she must have some possibilities in life, she must have a future.”

The woman hosting Tetiana and Yana said she was motivated to take in refugees after seeing civilians being bombed and families trying to escape.

“I think a mother's or a family's greatest fear is of anything happening to their child or losing their child. It sounds like nothing but it's a huge thing to protect a child. So how can you not help? How can you not help somebody who wants to save their child from an atrocity?”

She said Tetiana had “the heart of a lion” and was glad to see Yana becoming more comfortable as the days in Ireland passed.

“What is more important really than the life of a child? Whatever happens in that child's life makes them an adult. These are their formative years so we have to try and protect them and support the mothers.”

When Tetiana and Yana move to Killeigh she will take in another family.

Looking at Yana on a swing in the playground, she observed: “That is the calmest I have seen her.”

Tetiana continues to look forward to a day when the war will end and her family can be reunited. But she does not believe Russian forces should be permitted to stay in the east of Ukraine.

She said she believes Putin's view is: “If I can have this, then I will have this, and more and more and more.”

She added: “Russia understands only the speech of force.”

She hopes the Ukrainian army will be able to push the Russian forces out of the eastern region of Donbas.

“Don't let them stay in Donbas, I hope, I pray for it. Don't let our politicians say 'Ok, they may stay in Donbas'. No, because too many people lost their lives there, in Donbas, in Luhansk.”

She says she and her husband have family connections right across Ukraine. Her grandmother was from the Luhansk region in the east, her father's area is Kyiv, her husband is “from a little town near Lviv” and his father's family on his grandmother's side were from central Ukraine.

“We are from all Ukraine.”

Her cousin is with the territorial defence and his wife and three children are in Poland. “Yesterday he sent me a photo and I am so happy to see he is alive... Very many of my friends are now in army, they are fighting. Every day I am trying to know if everything is ok, if they're alive.”

She added: “My friend from school, he's lost, we don't know where he is. He was in Irpin and we don't know what has happened.”

“I understand, that in some time... I hope, war will end. We will come back to our country and I hope that all around the world, all people will see Ukrainians and you will think good about us. I want them to remember us as good people.”

Tetiana had heard of Tullamore prior to coming here because her husband was once presented with a gift of Tullamore DEW at work.

“So I knew there was some place like Tullamore. I like this country, I like England, Scotland and Ireland, I read about these countries and history and we know there is 'Tullamore'. And then all this happened and I find myself in Tullamore and it was some kind of shock!”

She thought to herself: “What is Tullamore really? How can this happen? We know about Tullamore DEW and we have only one sort of this whiskey in Kyiv. Here there is so many.”

Laughing, she concluded: “It was very tasty whiskey.”